Adventures in Motherhood

Me, rambling about motherhood and my ridiculous life…

Fast lane… August 24, 2008

Filed under: Uncategorized — Ohdeerestme @ 2:03 am

I enjoy having issues with things. I am sure everyone does….. I am happy swim in my issues. I like to get right in there and rant away. If it doesn’t make sense, fine!! Just don’t interrupt.
And rambling…. I like that too…

It feels like the pace of life has picked up. Not just my life, what with having a son and all, but life in general. And not just mine, everyones…
(I am currently watching the movie Speed, and they are getting ready to jump the bus… )
I don’t know if this is as a result of getting older…. I remember when I was a child, a birthday took a lifetime to arrive, and I would carefully measure my age in terms of how close I was to my next one. I remember solemnly anouncing that I was 4 and a quarter.
(They totally jumped the bus and it was awesome!!)
Now my birthday just flashes by, and this year it was the hugest non-event ever. I hardly noticed to be honest.
But really what I mean is the speed at which everything is happening. As in driving.
And people’s total impatience at everything that even hints at ‘slow’…

In Florida no-one even stops at a stop sign anymore. They just roll on through…. and I don’t mean slowly inch forward and kind of make it look like they are stopping. I mean, people corner like they are on rails. There is no attempt to even make it look like stopping. Some people even speed up as they approach stop signs.

(Isn’t it funny that I am talking about speed and I am watching Speed at the same time?? )
It seems like even the act of stopping is deemed too much of a hassle.
(Keanus is currently clinging to the underside of the bus with a screwdriver)
When did this happen?? This utter lack of patience?
In Florida, people actually use the merge lane to pass slower cars. And use exit ramps as a means to bypass them as well. It makes it tricky to navigate the roadways these days as you never know what the car in front of you is going to do. Speed up? Stop abruptly? Use hazard lights to park on a crosswalk? Who knows… its a mystery…
(Keanu’s range as an actor is……..umm…narrow… how can love and anger be the same?)

However, one should be careful as to how one reacts to all of this bad driving. My husband was careful to warn me never to flip off the car next to me as you never knew if they had a gun on the passenger seat or not. I get random road-rage, which has increased incident-wise since I moved South.
Once, someones poor parking lot manouvering skills led me to making a face at them. I then parked my car, went shopping and returned to find a note on my windshield that simply said “You are a moron.” Nice.
(Who thinks Keanu’s acting skills have improved since this movie? Ah……no…..)

Anyways, it just seems like everyone is so impatient. No-one wants to wait for anything. The faster the better. Instant gratification. Do it. Now. Do it! Now!!
Now!
Everyone wants life streamlined and easy. And the worst example of this is those darn birthcontrol ads. Why have your period 12 times a year, when you could have it 4??
Seriously, then why even have it at all? I guess if we have pills to create erections and drugs to increase fertility, then why not pills to decrease menstruation? And of course, laser treatments to permanently remove body hair.
(Wow, I am lucky tonight…. Speed is followed by Speed 2!!! Sweet!)
Everytime I think of laser hair removal, I think of a contest a local radio station had where the listeners could vote on what shape one of the female radio hosts had her pubic hair lasered into.
Seriously, who wants to be 80 and have their pubes in the shape of a dollar sign! Or a heart?

I am too tired tonight to be any more coherent than I am now… hopefully you get my gist though…
(man, I almost spelled ‘gist’ with a ‘j’………. jist…. looks a bit rude)
Speed=not soo good
Taking time to enjoy life=good

My bed+Dr Who Season 1 dvd= Heaven

Night!

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