Adventures in Motherhood

Me, rambling about motherhood and my ridiculous life…

WME July 13, 2009

happybaby-blog

I got home today thinking that things were pretty much in order….

Sped home, picked up V, dashed to Publix and got home at a reasonable time. 6 pm. Not too shabby!

Dinner preparations began. First some peas….

I heated them up, cooled them off a little, walked over to him and slowly spilled them onto his highchair top. He giggled. I guess the sight of all those peas rolling around was quite funny.

Peas are his new favorite vegetable to eat whole. He happily picks them off his tray and stuffs them into his little mouth. During this stuff-in time, I add some cubed Edam cheese while I heat up a veggie pattie in the microwave.

My new favorite foods for him are from *surprise* WholeFoods! I know thats a huge shocker… But they do have the best gluten/wheat free selection I have found in town, and also have an interesting selection of gluten-free toddler food.

My current favorite? HappyBaby‘s HappyBites. The veggie-tots are what are currently swinging around our kitchen…

I cooled the veggie-tot down on the counter, but pick up and hand delivered it to V’s table, to his apparent delight.

One piece in. No problem. And chewed to evident delight.

Number 2 hit that little mouth and the screams that issued after could seriously have woken the dead. I spun around, only to see V clawing at his little mouth.

Oh. My. God.

I quickly figured out that it was just too hot for that tender little palate. I swear I temperature tested it before hand…. bad mummy. I felt so horrible. That little face was so red and those little eyes were clenched shut. I did an ‘extraction’…. which means that I scooped that little mess right out of his mouth. Oh man. There was a hidden chunk of potato that was hotter than everything else. Oh that poor little mouth…

But problem solved… he has such a good temperament that he quickly moved past it and went on to stuff something else in there. Oh great. Same thing. Veggie tots. Hot.

Scream. Wail. Shriek. Claw at face. Turn red. Awesome.

By this time I was almost crying myself…. more mad at myself than anything. How could I have missed that piece that was slightly hotter than everything else? So much for my temperature testing skills…..

And then…..*sigh* it happened again.

Clearly I can’t tell temperature at all. Seriously!

This time it was so hot that those little chubby fists shook with frustration while those finger tried to claw everything out of that mouth.

Again, how did I miss this. Or was it just hot enough that, piled on top of the other hot things it pushed everything over the limit.

I felt awful. AWFUL.

Bad mummy. I completely checked everything temperature-wise…. perhaps I just…. oh… I don’t know…. I still feel awful. I gave him some ice-cream to cool that little mouth of his down. We brushed his teeth and off he went to bed.

Worst Mummy Ever. Total WME event. Embarrassingly enough, on top of all of this I felt the need to share this with random Internet-slash-family.

Clearly I am just looking for punishment…

 

Brick-like July 7, 2009

bricks-blog

I just got a chunk of waffle tossed into my hair.

Since this is not breakfast-time, I know you are surprised. I was.

It was unearthed in Chewies Dog-bed (which really is a cat-bed. Even though he’s a dog). Chewie has this tendency to bury things he won’t eat in his little bed.  I just found it a few minutes ago and thought it was funny. Ever since M became ‘Mr Mum’ I have found a lot of random bits of food all over the house.

Now part of it might be that we are doing a lot of ‘wheat-free’ cooking. Tapioca bread and wheat-free waffles. Tapioca bread does not toast well. If you make it golden brown, that actually means ‘brick’ in the language of toast.

And M is such a good Mr Mum. He toasts things to perfection, a lovely golden-brown. Which might make for deliciousness in our wheat-filled world. But actually means ‘cobble my sidewalk with your toast pieces’ in the land of the wheat-free.

I have accidentally stepped on it. I know. It is as hard as a m-f’er.

Apparently Chewie is not interested in our new wheat-free life-style. In the evenings, when I am home and M is off at his summer evening job of serving…. I find little morsels in corners of all the rooms. Waffles in the living-room. Biscuits in the bedroom. Toast everywhere. Chewie hates toast. Well, wheat-free toast anyways.

At least, this wheat -free toast. I think he would have liked what V was eating in Canada. We needed a dog in Canada to clean up the mess V made.

So, unbeknowest to V, wheat-free sucks. It sucks as even the dog won’t eat it.

And then, Chewie did something that surprised me. In retrospect though, it shouldn’t have.

He ate the waffle. So I guess, in hindsight, it wasn’t that bad. I just wish M hadn’t thrown it at me first……

 

Zap! July 6, 2009

zap-blog

As you may or may not know, V is an actual genius.

It’s true.

He proves it to us day after day. Sometimes I wonder if it’s just that we are easily impressed… But these things he does are AMAZING! We are astounded.

He eats a blueberry for the first time…… HOLY COW!!

He gobbles down asparagus like it was candy, making me exclaim “Ha! I know you got that from Grandpa Larry!”. WOW!

He crawls faster that I can run, which clearly illustrates that I need to exercise more as I must be going pretty slow. Right? Or maybe he’s just a super-fast baby. KAZAAM!!

He charms all ladies with a single casual coy glance from those heavily-lashed caramel-brown eyes. BA-BAYAM! (Southern accent is implied here)

I am sure that this must be getting ‘old hat’ for all 4 of you that read this blog on a regular basis. I am sure you are thinking things like “Yes, yes Jaime. We know he is amazing *sigh* and charming *double sigh* and super clever *HUGE extra deep super-sigh*.  For the LOVE OF GOD.”

Yes, yes, I know all of that. But then, tonight, he did something unbelievable.

And you ready for it??

Are you sure?

Can you handle the full-on buffalo-jumping-off-of-a-cliff super excitement of it all??

The most amazing I-just-discovered-the-most-awesome-musician-I-have-ever-heard-and-I-want-to share-it-with-everyone kind of feeling?

A kind of I-rode-a-camel-for-the-first-time kind of unbelievable feeling?

Alright… here it is.

He clapped his hands by himself.

Holy crap!

As I was watching him do it, it was like my mind couldn’t comprehend what was going on. I saw him doing the action, and watched the “I am clever” smile light up his face, but still, I had no idea what he was doing. It was like when I saw him stand up for the first time. I almost didn’t believe it.

I think he clapped for about 30 seconds straight before I actually comprehended what he was doing. I followed my non-comprehension with “Good job, Little Man!”. And then I cried.

Oh my big boy…. Clapping away by himself in his high-chair, covered in grilled cheese sandwich,  as I was grilling him some asparagus and defrosting some of his birthday cake for dessert. I know “grilling”, right? I might as well grow his own food while I am at it.

Ok, back to me blathering away. I cried. V is one. He claps. I am teaching him to point at pictures in his bedtime books, he is saying things to me that almost sound like real words. I swear he said “Pop-Pop” the other day. My heart might explode.

Too. Much. Emotion.

If I can’t even handle clapping, how am I going to manage him walking. Even going potty. Clearly I will just be an emotional mess until he is in his 30’s. Can’t wait!

 

I (we) need July 5, 2009

need-blog

Things I haven’t done in a while:

Cut my toe-nails

Taken a relaxing bath.

Read a book on a quiet Sunday morning.

Read a book.

Watched a whole movie.

Things I have done recently:

Cleaned a very dirty bum.

Stroked a sweaty, sad litte brow.

Planted and watched some herbs grown on my front porch.

Heard the words “You complete me” sung through my ipod headphones at the tail end of a run, while looking at M and V play in the park. Thinking….”Oh, my…. it is true”.

Things I will do in the future:

Get a tattoo.

Teach V how to nod his head. Currently he can only shake his head and say “Nananananananana…” to everything, even if its things he wants.

Help those chubby little feet sit flat on the ground, instead of up on their tip-toes like they are now. Future ballerina? I think not. He already has linebacker shoulders.

Buy a house.

Buy a house before Christmas.

Finally convince M that I do, indeed, need a nightly foot massage.

 

2nd July 2, 2009

2nd-blog

I just made a bet with myself…and the internet…..

I bet that I can blog everyday. And if  I win, I get a massage from M (he is shouting in the background “Hey! I didn’t agree to that!!!!”….. doesn’t matter, my bet, not his) every night as well! It is shaping up to be an interesting month. My birthday month too.

In a week or so, I hit 33.

33. Man.

This year I am celebrating with tattoos. It is a Cousin-Love date. And by that, I mean that C and I are hitting up Ocala as I have been dying for an introduction to her favorite artist. Who just happens to be from BC as well, which is as random as you can get. A Canadian? In Ocala? Probably there are more of them there, but this is the first I’ve heard of it. As far as I know he is the only one there. Poor lonely Canadian. It’s so hard to befriend the natives….

I think he will make the 3rd Canadian that I know in Florida. I know there are more of you around, sometimes us Canadians are a little shy… we can’t be found at the outlet malls like the British and other Europeans. We are more likely to be found down in the Everglades or at some State Park swimming with Manatees than hitting up the cheap shoe sales…. (although, we totally will check out those sales after we check out the Manatees). Manatees totally come first, especially before a good sale at Premium Outlet Malls…

So how about it, eh? Do you think I can? Every day for a whole month….

Prepare for both riveting, epic posts and mundane boring poop. Oh, and actual poop. Both domestic and canine…

 

Home Depot of Dads June 29, 2009

dad-blog

Monday night, M and I reclining in the living room.

We have survived. 4 whole days of teething. 4 new teeth coming in. An interesting new habit I like to call ‘Tantrum”. An unfortunate lack of regular naps (he is very stubborn). Oh, and the end of the Cheezie stash in our apartment. It’s been a tough couple of days….

Regardless, we both finished a lovely dish of homemade Pad Thai, a few glasses of red wine and are watching some Burn Notice (which is our latest non-thinking evening entertainment. We watch it while I blog and M plays around on his DS…. fights Ogres, Dragons and Orcs and other things like that.

So tonight I dedicate to my darling M.

Mr Mum, as he is known this summer. Mr Mum is awesome. Every morning V and Mr Mum walk to the park to play. Every morning they meet their new dog friends, Jake and Pretty, on their way to the park. I know they have fun as the stroller comes home covered in some kind of new substance which I think is a combination of grapes, cheese and sand. It is sort of like cement (I noticed it was as I was trying to scrub it off the stroller this evening).

Breakfast and lunch are duly (and lovingly made). Outfits are hastily and poorly put together, but in a wonderful sort of way. Tops and bottoms are the opposite of matching. He would be the Dad that the other Mums in the park oooh and aah over. And bring extra snacks for. And dote on. Man, this could be trouble….. He is rather lost looking and adorable…. that’s M I mean, not V…..

He is such a good Dad. All Dads are good dads, but it is an amazing thing to watch a new Dad at work. M is unlocking abilities that I never knew exsisted in him. He is mastering new levels. His skill level is rising.

And I am playing too much  Mob Wars on FB.

Regardless, M is total Major Dad this summer. He is all schedules,  parameters and other technical terms I can’t think of right now. Everything is organized. Listed. Super organized. M is the Home Depot of organized. And the Lowes of Dads.

It’s shaping up to be an awesome hardware store-filled summer  for the boys…

 

You give me fever…. June 27, 2009

tooth-blog

and by you, I mean 1 year old shots…

V had his birthday visit to the Dr on Monday and got a few shots. One of which was the dreaded MMR shot. Now I trust his doctor, a lot. She is very open and doesn’t hesitate stating what she has done/used on her children (the latest 2 of which were born about 1 month after V). I realize there is a lot of conjecture about this particular series of shots…. and we went with yes. Yes means he can go to school. Yes means he can go to daycare. Yes means I have read enough online and in magazines and books to feel like it is appropriate for my child.

He cried for 2 seconds during the series of shots and, as always, stopped abruptly when M made faces at him. He is such a Daddy-slash-Mummy’s boy…

Anyways, last night I picked him up from Pop-Pop and he felt a little warm. I thought it was because they had been out walking in the sun. But after we got home and half way through dinner he was still just as warm. So I took his temperature.

99.9

Hmmm.

Well, that concerns me, just a little.

So in we went to a cool bath, and I dosed him with some Tylenol.

And just to preface this next series of sentences, my little man is not the snuggliest of boys. He loves me, cries for me when I leave the room and clings to my skin with his needle -like nails. But is not an active snuggler. I love and pray and wish for any moment when he does lay his sweet little head on my shoulder and sigh deeply into my neck. It makes my mummy-heart melt. It doesn’t happen as often as I would like.

So as I was reading him his evening “5 Little Monkeys” and “Good Night Moon”, and a quarter of the way through the first book we struggled with some screaming and flailing and finally settled with a sad little head resting on Mummy’s shoulder…. thats when I knew that things weren’t ok.

My poor boo…

It was a rough night for me…. he slept like a baby (which I guess he still is),and I woke at every little sound.

This morning when he woke up, it was the same thing. Little Man wanted Mummy. Really just Mummy’s shoulder to lay his slightly sweaty little head on and my arm to lightly clench with those needle-like fingernails of his.

Broke. My. Heart.

Broke. My. Heart. is also called “I have Mummy wrapped around my fingers”. Which he does.

This evening as we were getting Little Man ready for bed, I totally did a ‘BNE’ into that mouth of his. M was making him laugh so much, that mouth was open open open. It used to be easy to see if he was getting teeth, there was nothing else in there. Now there are 8 sharp teeth in there and I can no longer see. Well, I can, but I risk getting my finger bit off while I look.

This mouth-mission required a forcible entrance. Which meant crying. V is anti-everything to do with his mouth….

5 minutes later I learned that 3 teeth had just broken the surface. And had a very upset child in my arms.

And suddenly I understood everything.

Fever-check. Red cheeks-check. Irritability-check. Plus shots on Monday equals Motherhood.

Yay Motherhood!!

For a toothfairy pillow of your own, click here

 

Banana (genius!) June 21, 2009

banana-blog

I thought a lot about flying with V before our actual trip. A lot.

I MIGHT have over-thought everything, just a bit. I was really trying to think about things to do with him on the plane, but with a one year old that is a little tricky. Things that would work on older and younger children I didn’t think would work with him.

He doesn’t sit still ever.

And hates being held quietly and rocked like a younger child possibly would. Oh, and screams when falls asleep.

So a lot of thought went into what to take in that diaper bag of mine.

Snacks, toys, bottles and juice. That is pretty much what I had. Oh, and a banana.

The Banana, or  the herbaceous plants of the genus Musa, is cultivated primarily for its fruit.

Bananas are grown in at least 107 countries. In  popular culture and commerce, “banana” usually refers to soft, sweet “dessert” bananas. The bananas from a group of cultivars with firmer, starchier fruit are called plantains. Bananas may also be cut and dried and eaten as a type of chip. Dried bananas are also ground into banana flour.

Although the wild species have fruits with numerous large, hard seeds, virtually all culinary bananas have seedless. Bananas are classified either as dessert bananas (meaning they are yellow and fully ripe when eaten) or as green cooking bananas.

V loves them, which was why I brought one. And spur of the moment, I decided to give the whole thing to him, skin and all to eat.

Holy burst of motherhood genius!!

That banana kept him occupied for about 25 minutes. I peeled the the skin back and let him hold the whole fruit, the skin draping down over those plump little fingers.

He was enchanted.

That little mouth didn’t know exactly what to do with it though. He tried to bite it with those 8 little teeth, but didn’t have much of an effect on the banana. He tried again, and managed to get some of the fruit in his mouth. With each bite he grew braver and braver, finally managing to take a whole mouthful of the fruit in one bite.

Banana was everywhere. How nice that I decided to save this moment for his first airplane ride, eh? It was on the airplane phone, the window, me, the seat in front of us, me again, him, all over him and his seatbelt and also my hands. I actually had a collection of banana pieces in my hand, the ones he didn’t feel like keeping in his mouth and spat out. Now normally I would just drop them on the floor and shout “Chewie!!! What’s this!!!” and our dog would come running and eat it.

That doesn’t quite fly on an airplane (harhar). So I just collected those little soggy bits in the palm of my hand and waited patiently for M to finish his diet soda so I could deposit them.

So word to the mothers out there. Bananas are genius for domestic flights!

Don’t, however, try and take one through customs entering the USA without declaring it, or you will be subjected to the excitement that we were (bag searches, flagged for the ‘short’ customs lineup (aka longest line ever with super strict scanning people) and having your bag swabbed for bomb residue). If you do bring any fruit through from Canada to the USA, make sure that it has the sticker on it. Apparently Canada imports from some countries that the USA doesn’t, and this is a huge issue.

Apart from that whole kerfuffle, I am a wellspring of motherhood genius! Banana! Genius!

 

Flirt June 19, 2009

Flower V-blog

Traveling with anyone gives you a great sense of how you relate to them…

When M and I traveled together for the first time, I knew immediately we were destined for marriage…

(ha! Just kidding!! I think I was all annoyed at him for something. So nothing has really changed since then. However, we travel really well together)

When Mum and I went to Kyoto for a wee trip (and actually the whole time she stayed with me in Japan, it was the same deal. We had no problems that we couldn’t resolve) We travel well together too.

We had never traveled seriously with Little Man before and, as we were soon to discover, traveling with children is interesting.

Our flight to Vancouver was a 2-parter, Orlando to Chicago/Chicago to Vancouver.

Part One: Disaster

Involving screaming, screaming, screaming. Break. (Involving eating). Screaming, screaming, screaming. Deplane.

It. Was. AWFUL.

Part Two: Tsunami

Waves and waves of screaming/quiet, screaming/quiet. AWFUL. This went on for 3 hours.

In the Customs lineup, someone from our flight leaned over the railing in front of us and said “He didn’t really sleep that much, did he?”. Um, no. No he didn’t. Thanks for pointing that out. I hadn’t noticed at all.

In between the bouts of screaming and sleep were these rather interesting moments, where V was assessing the cabin. He likes to make eyecontact with everyone and when he does he breaks out into the hugest, most flirtatious smile you have ever seen. Those big brown eyes of his are so engaging…

So full of charm, in fact, that one Flight Attendant declared that we might be related as V apparently looked just like her brother, and she doted on him the entire flight. Her co-worker declared him to be “The Cutest Baby I have Ever Seen” (and, she also said, ‘I have seen a lot’). Of course M and I soaked this all up… (and might have preened a little as well).

And it went on and on… People…. well, women really, peering around corners and stating that he was gorgeous. That he was flirting with them. And just giggling inanely and waving like idiots….

And this is when I got the first inkling that I might have given birth to a future heart-throb…..

Right now it is adorable. Charming. Makes my heart burst… 15 years from now? It will probably make my heart break.

 

Dedication June 5, 2009

dedication-blog

Shopping at Whole Foods the other day (I might as well add them as a sponser I am there so much) looking for peanut butter substitutes.

See if you can follow my logic here. Peanut-butter substitutes are mostly for people who are allergic to peanuts. Correct? Or for people who have wide and adventurous palates… perhaps?

OK, so lets say we swing with the allergy folks, we know there are lots of you out there. If you are like me, you read the ingredients because just saying that it’s peanut-free on the label is not enough for me. I need to check and see for myself. When I see things like…. oh…. I don’t know, perhaps an addition-slash-warning on a label that says something like “Made in a facility that uses machinery that also processes peanut products“….

DANGER DANGER WILL ROBINSON! DANGER!!

Seriously…. I am disappointed in you. Why would I let my child eat a product that quite potentially has come in contact with something he is really allergic to? Do you think I am stupid? Or perhaps you think I don’t read?

This was what I noticed as I carefully perused the ‘nutbutter’ selection at Whole Foods. I know there are sunflower butters and soy nut butters. Yes, yes… I know all about these…. but what I am looking for is something that actually tastes good.

A few months ago I bought soynut butter. The first few tastes were pretty good. V even liked it!

It makes me gag. For real. There is an awful after-taste of soynuts that, it turns out, make me heave even thinking about it. AND I like roasted soynuts. Just something about the butter, I guess. And looking at the sunflower butter made me think similar things. I like sunflower seeds. I don’t want them to be ruined for me too.

And that is when I started thinking about hazelnuts, almonds and other yummy nuts. Especially hazelnuts. Hazelnut butter sounds divine.

Guess what? All the brands that Whole Foods stocked were all processed in plants that also process peanuts. So thats the end of that.

I left sooooo mad. Not at Whole Foods, but at the brands out there that aren’t looking at the whole picture. You can take the step to branch out to an area that you will have success in, but are incapable of seeing beyond that little area.

Dedicated factories man…. now thats what I am talking about. Come on, be ballsy…… take that next step….

To read about a family being nut-free (and egg-free), check this out. It certainly is interesting to read about what a family with a pretty serious situation does. My kudos to them for find new and interesting ways to make it work with little kids…