Adventures in Motherhood

Me, rambling about motherhood and my ridiculous life…

Badassicalness July 12, 2009

Celine-blog

A new feature I am thinking about adding to my blog as either a weekly or bi-monthly event. By event, I really mean ‘post’.

I am looking to feature interesting people and/or interesting blogs/websites. If this works the way I hope it will, I eventually want to add a give-away element to it too.

But for now, it will just be a feature….

Tonight’s Sunday Night Featurette will be….

~Celine B.~

Queen of cakes and sarcasm.

And a family member, so you know this is going to be flattering….. (she’s so purdy)

Brief history:

Celine hails from the West Coast of Canada. Or Wet Coast. Or however you like to call it. She migrated South, as all people tend to do, a few years ago and settled on the West Coast of Florida for a few years. She joined Publix and immediately began her meteoric rise. Quickly moving her way from associate (clerk) to Assistant Bakery Manager, mostly by sheer skill. And charm. She quickly moved inland to the Orlando area, where she is currently residing and plotting her take-over of all things bakery…

That Canadian work ethic is no match at all for… well…. anything. For real.

Especially considering the pure lack of ethic that appears to be so common these days…..

Skills:

That girl can bake a mean cake/pie/muffin/cupcake

That woman can tease a mean rock-a-billy poof (pending pictures).

That sister from another mister can decorate like you wouldn’t believe. And even if you do believe, if you saw it you still wouldn’t believe it could be that amazing.

She is amazingly creative, something which she has always had a flare for…. She shows it so clearly in her creations, especially the way her fingers delicately tease that fondant into the most interesting shapes.

Illustrated here:

cake-blog

cake2-blogcake-3

For her cake-skillz in the Orlando area… please email me @ toodlepoop@gmail.com


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Picky July 4, 2009

You know when you finally decide to take that big step in a direction that means ‘responsibility’? It’s kind of like teetering on the edge of a cliff forever…… finally someone comes up behind you and gives you a big ol’ push over the edge. There you are….. totally free-falling, no idea what to do, with a how-to manual clutched in your hand.

“Cliff-diving for Dummies”.

Really, it’s “House-Buying for Dummies”.

I think the tenants that moved in above us finally pushed me over the edge. M, apparently, hasn’t noticed them at all. All I hear is ‘thump thump thump’. And then there are our new neighbours across the courtyard, who bbq right in front of our living-room window. Awesome. I might as well just invite myself.

I guess M and I kind of keep to ourselves. We are just private kind of people that are not on first name basis with all of our apartment neighbours. We also do not party with them. Or drink with them randomly, or really hang out with any of them at all. You wouldn’t want to either.

Now ‘house’ neighbours are a different kind of story. If you are buying, you will be friendly with your neighbours. The end.

So as we blunder, slowly, through this whole initial process it’s like my brain just wants to shut down.

I look at homes online. I email our realtor things I think we’d like. She emails me back. I talk to M about when we want to look at them….. and thats when things seem to slow down for us.

We want to. But…..we also want to do everything else but physically look at them. We also are ultra picky. And have also put a time-limit on this whole thing. We are determined to take advantage of that tax credit. And also don’t want to renew our lease, which is up in October. And also we seem to be quite picky.

We don’t mind a little bit rundown. But not too rundown. We don’t mind a foreclosure, but would prefer one that comes with a pool, a pool that is sparkling clean. A 3/2 is at the bottom of the list, but a 4/2 would be better. And all of this needs to fall into a rather srict budget, and ever stricter neighbourhood that we have outlined.

And this is all tentative. Sometimes I think to myself “What the hell are we doing?!?!”

And then I think “Oh,right. We hate renting and want a house. And are firmly in our 30’s. And have a baby. And this is the next logical step.”

And so, yet again, we are picky. And possibly (a) pain(s) in the ass (es).

*sigh* This is exhausting to even type about….

pick-it-blog

 

StarWars May 31, 2009

starwars-blog

M and I ventured to DisneyWorld today with V…. always fun to do on the weekend, and since we get in for free there is really no reason not to go.

On our arrival I heard some familiar music. I couldn’t place it at first, but the closer we got to the enterance and then as we were walking through the bag-search area it struck me. Star Wars. Oh my….

It was StarWars weekend at Hollywood studios! How did I not know that they did this? I was sure that M would have mentioned it to me since I thought he was ‘Star Wars obsessed’. But, as he told me while we hustled through the crowds,  “I’m not really that into it anymore”. Bullsh*t is what I thought of that statement. Pretty much all men are in love with Star Wars. As they all love Westerns. And The Godfather. And if they protest that they don’t like either of those 3, they are lying!

Once we got through the main gates of MGM (or HollyWood Studios as it’s called now), there was a full-on StarWars parade in action. Storm Troopers all over the place. Chewbacca carrying C-3P0. Darth Vader. Etc.

I personally saw 4 children dressed up as Storm Troopers (and one who’s Mum didn’t do up the back of his costume and his tush was hanging out.) One grown man dressed as as Anakin. One dressed as Obi-Wan. One man pushing a baby stroller coming out of a gift shop dressed up in an orange pilot costume.

V wasn’t interested in anything at all. In fact, we took him to Muppets 3-D Adventure and with all that noise and us trying to fuss with 3-D glasses on his face (for fun) he fell fast asleep on Daddy. Fast asleep. M turned to me and said “He is totally going to sleep like this on the plane.” Oh god I hope so….

Home from the parks, V in bed early, post dinner, M and I are indulging in a ‘True Blood’ marathon. Pretty much the furthest thing away from StarWars that you could ever get. Dare I say that we like it more?

Blasphemy!

 

Mother knows best May 25, 2009

mother-blog

Sunday morning M, V and I headed off into the beautiful sunshine for an outdoor excursion. Where were we going? I wasn’t that sure… all I knew is that it was an hour away. In the middle of loading everything up into M’s car, his father called and asked if we wanted to borrow theirs for the trip.

Their car is a sweet ride, all new leather interior with Sirius satellite radio and so of course the answer was yes. We headed over to their house, switched cars, re-loaded everything up and off we went. About 5 minutes after we left, M turned to me and said “Did you remember the stroller?” to which I replied “Of course!” in a confident manner. I WAS confident. I remember putting it in the trunk. No worries!

An hour later we arrived at Cyprus Gardens. It used to be one of the earliest theme parks in Florida, M explained to me. A few years ago they closed down all the rides but kept the gardens open. And added on a water park.

As we pulled into the parking lot, parked and got out… M swung around to the back of the car and opened the trunk.

Lo and behold it was empty! No stroller to be found anywhere. Where was it, you ask? Lounging in the trunk of M’s Mitsubishi in Orlando not in Polk County (where we were). Hmmm, my confidence was suddenly gone. Darn, I remember putting it in ‘a’ trunk. Not necessarily the trunk of the car we were in.

Things to remember when traveling with children:

Bring a stroller. Or at least make sure you can rent one wherever you are going. Or your arm might break off (like mine almost did while carrying V around). I know you aren’t retarded so I am sure you already knew this…

Bring hat(s). And be prepared for those hats to be flung off. I kept saying to M that I couldn’t believe we forgot one. And he kept saying “But all he does is throw them off”, which is true. But still wish we had one.

Sunscreen (especially if you live in places like Florida) is key. Even better if it is ‘stick’ form, which works well for little faces.

Water. Food. Food. Food. Water. Food.

Make sure your arms are nicely stretched out and can handle carrying your child that will for sure throw a fit after being in the stroller for 20 minutes or more. My bicep on my right arm is developing nicely. Not so much on my left…

Make sure you have lots of extra diapers. My darling child immediately filled his the minute we entered the gardens. So we immediately entered the washroom….

Which leads me to my  next point… make sure you have a changing pad. Baby changing stations are icky. Oh and a poo-bag. Oh, and most important…. hand sanitizer. (This particular changing station wouldn’t fold out completely, so V was on an angle. But on the plus side he was fascinated by being on an angle and I changed diapers with lightening-like speed!)

And in conclusion, don’t forget anything. And over-pack. And never forget to bring extra food/diapers/food/diapers. And make sure you pack enough snacks to feed a small army.

 

Beautiful South May 10, 2009

Filed under: family,Florida,Mummy,running,Spring,The South,Uncategorized — Ohdeerestme @ 12:59 pm
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Florida-blog

I went for a run around 9:15 this morning. Perfect time of day…. not too hot yet, bit of a breeze.

As I ran, the sweet scent of gardenias brushed past my nose filling my lungs with deliciously scented air and my mind with spring-like thoughts. 6 squirrels perched on a brick wall near the gardenias and watched me as I passed. One leaped off the wall and darted in front of me, pacing me for a bit before heading back to the wall with his brothers and sisters.

Blooming hibiscuses brushed the top of my baseball cap.

White ibises waddled in the grass nearby.

And all around, the gorgeous smell of gardenias…. truly it was a beautiful morning.

Happy Mother’s day.

 

Tan April 19, 2009

Filed under: Florida,tan,Uncategorized — Ohdeerestme @ 10:18 pm
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tanline-blog

Little snapshot of Florida…

Today, while M and I were waiting in our car to make a right turn I glanced across the street where there was a Walgreens.

In the parking-lot there appeared to be a fancy white convertible car and two highly tanned people were standing next to it, partially obscured by the bushes that surrounding the lot.

Mrs Tan was lubing up Mr Tan. Not in kind of way, you sickos.

Literally, I mean.

She was actually spreading sunscreen on him in the parking-lot. Smearing it all over his upper body (why was he shirtless at a Walgreen’s?) and his neck, head and face.

I was fascinated by this. Luckily, we were stuck at this light for a while and I could just keep staring.

She did his whole upper body (from what I could see over the bushes anyways). In the parking-lot. “M, what is she putting on his face?! Sunscreen?”. In the parking-lot of a Walgreen’s.

Which for my Canadian readers out there is like lubing up your half-naked body outside of  Shoppers, in Sidney kind of over by the liquor store, in that little plaza in the handicap parking spot…

Already they were the colour of mahogany. Leathery skin so leathery you could see it across an intersection of a 6-lane road, through bushes and through a parking-lot. Thank god they decided to use some ‘screen’. Lord only knows where this would have gone.

Ahhhh, Florida….

 

Bikram, eh! April 13, 2009

Filed under: Canada,spandex,sweat,The South,yoga — Ohdeerestme @ 10:09 pm
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southern-blogJust back from another class, where I sweated my balls off (if I had balls, that is).

Essentially, it was awesome. I saw sweat drip off my body at a rate that I had never seen before. It was like heavy rain dripping off of the leaves on the plant by my front door. Like pearls falling off and hitting and bouncing on a dance-floor (as that is where all pearl necklaces get broken). It was non-stop.

I twisted my spine. I bend my back all over the place. I massaged my colon with my knee (I know you are thinking “She did what?!” And also “Gosh, she is so flexible!”).

I tasted colours.

Delicious.

Even Spandex-man was there, sadly in the same outfit as before. I was hoping for an Easter-themed spandex outfit. I am getting a little tired of the pale blue.

As much as I love yoga, I miss seeing V at all after work as I head from work pretty much right to class. And he is in bed by the time I get home.

M and I were chatting over dinner, and I was planning tomorrow evening and how I am going to hog little man. Keep him all to myself. Just soak up all that ‘Mummy-adoration’ and giggles.

“I think I’ll take him to the Park”, I said to M. Except I didn’t say ‘Park’.

I said ‘Perk’.

I also say ‘Caffeee’. Instead of ‘Coffee’.

And ‘soda’ instead of ‘pop’.

Oh, and ‘Ent’ instead of ‘Aunt’.

And of course ‘ma’am and sir’ to all the lovely ladies and gentlemen. Only the polite thing to say down here in the ‘Sauth‘. (To learn more about how to act like a proper Southern lady or gentleman, and also how to build a ‘Chicken Ark’ of your very own,  check out the above link)

I haven’t ventured into the ‘Honey-child’ or ‘sweetie’ quite yet. But I imagine that it’s on the way.

Hopefully a week in Canada this summer will sort this out right and proper. Bring back my crisp sounding letters. And my eh’s. Eh?